Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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