You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
