Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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