at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
