I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Boobs speak an international language.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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