5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
false alarm, still single
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
