i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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