I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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