There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
