like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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