Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
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