Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize