And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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