I wannas sexs uuuuu
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
