K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Help. Why am I so naked?
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