that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
