Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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