I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
