Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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