Your mouth is God's brothel.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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