he puts the penis in happiness.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
did i walk over a car last night?
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Randomize
