i just wanna soil my oats bro
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
