He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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