so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
