If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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