If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
