Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
