Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
