i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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