Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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