Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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