It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
they're like a gay fantastic four
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize