i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
