i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
