Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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