I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
