No, drunk sperm still make babies.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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