You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
