He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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