This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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