You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Randomize
