Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
