I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
