YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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