Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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