C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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