also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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