Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
