ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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