There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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